Write. Write. Write.

There's something about being pregnant.  You watch your belly grow and grow for 9 months.  You go through different phases as even we "skinny girls" get to try out our new J. Lo features--as well as heartburn, loose hip joints, pulling butt muscles when getting off the couch (does this happen to anyone else?), and of course, peeing your pants.

But even more noticable (I know--what could be more noticable than peeing your pants?) is this joyful and anticipatory burden you carry as you wait for your new baby to be born.  You see, that's how I feel about this little book I've been working on for six years.  There has been no way for me to speed up the process because I didn't want to go into labor prematurely.  I've had to feel the heartburn, the pull of butt muscles, and even a pair or two of wet jeans....and shoes.

I've had to feel and process through each heartbreak and joy--each seemingly disappointment that turned divine appointment.  I've had to keep journal after journal of my sometimes insane thoughts, temper tantrums, and moments of graceful thankfulness and forgiveness.  And not only that, I've had to start this sweet little blog that not only gives me the unction to write on regular basis, but it also connects me to people like you--who enjoy sharing in my life's ups and downs (or maybe you're just looking for some drama?). :)

All in all, I'm in this weird stage.  Maybe some of you can relate.  It's called "Ok, if I don't finish this book, I might kill someone."  All those Braxton Hicks contractions and all those centimeters dilated, it's been leading up to something.  This year.  And I feel so excited and terrified all at the same time--which is precisely why I am writing this blog.

I need your help.

It's time for the pushing to start. I need someone who will graciously hold my hand while I dig my knuckles in.  I need you fine readers of mine to check in on me once in awhile.  Ask me how it's going.  Tell me about one of my blogs that really touched you.  I ask this not to feed my ego but to help remind me of what I'm doing.

You see, I write for several different reasons. 1. My emotions and thoughts get all blocked up if I don't AKA "I go crazy in the head". 2. God has asked me to, and so I want to be obedient (and because He knows that if I don't, I'll end up like number 1). 3. I get to share with you.  I get to make friends and hopefully share something that will bring hope, life, and freedom to someone else.  Yes, I would like to change the world.  Whether it's seen or not seen.  4.  The God who asked me to do it, well when I actually do what He asks, it ends up pointing not only me, but other people to His grace, His provision, and His heart for His kids.  And I like when that happens--because He has changed my whole life around.  Abundant and overflowing.  I am not a statistic like I "should" be.

Instead, "I'm 30 and flirty and thriving." (Guess the movie!)

And that's because of Him.

So, there is my plea.  Please help keep me accountable.  I'm so excited to see this baby birthed--to see my dream become a reality, but it really is a group effort at this point.  And you sweet people have been part of that, and I am so grateful.  As I write, I think about who will read it often.  It doesn't matter to me whether it's 5 people or 5 billion people--as long as it means something.  And the very process of preparing it has, indeed, meant something.  This little book has changed my life, given me purpose, been a friend, and has listened when I went off into hypoglycemic rants.  And more importantly, it has pointed me to Him, brought me into a place of adoption instead of orphanhood, has confirmed my identity, and has brought me joy.  It has been one of my 44 moments (click on the 44 for the backstory).

And so, thank you, almost-finished book.  I promise I will try to do my due diligence to give you the time and devotion you deserve.  I will try not to let myself get spiritually constipated by ignoring you when you're calling my name.  And for the times that I do get constipated or writer's block, I will promise to let it go--because you are not just a thing to be checked off my to do list, but you are a living and breathing testament of my heart.  You are an act of worship and an offering of myself.  And whether broken or bruised--gladhearted or terrified, I will give of myself excellently.

And bless you, my sweet readers--whose emails and notes encourage me to be me and to live my life out loud!  You mean more than you know.

Until next time, thank you all!  (And please feel free to let me know how your "babies" are doing......I'd be happy to keep you accountable as well.)