"And I pray that the fellowship of your faith may become effective through the knowledge of every good thing which is in you for Christ's sake."--Philemon 1:6
Great verse, isn't it? I found it this morning after some contemplation about false humility.
I realized something about myself today. When I am pursuing something that is in my God-given DNA, I'm talking about the I-can't-breathe-if-I-don't-do-this-thing DNA, I am alive. It's intense, it's joy, it's what life is about.
And then...
Something slithers up next to me to push me down. You know what I'm talking about?
For me, this thing is called false humility.
It's a religious term. It makes you think you aren't following the rules (and if it haunts you, congratulations, you're not!). It tries to lower your expectations. It tries to steal your destiny.
Bah humbug!
Isn't it funny (but really not funny) how we can be convinced that giving attention to our good qualities or giftings is prideful? Something tells us that we shouldn't celebrate ourselves or our gifts, and often times, we listen.
Oh boy.
Somehow in our religious mindsets, I think we've decided that humility is either 1. feeling bad about ourselves as if we are not good enough or 2. lowering our expectations.
Well, here's what I discovered today. I am good enough. My Savior died to make me good enough, and I won't feel bad about myself. I like who I am. Actually, call me conceded, but I love who I am.
And then there's number two...
I don't know how many times I have been shot down or my dreams have been shot down by someone who wanted me to be less (myself included). Trying to lower my expectations, simmer me down. And, at times, I have fallen into this ugly lie's trap.
It's an easy one to fall into if you aren't paying attention. Especially if you live in a religious culture.
I somewhat understand the intentions behind wanting less. It seems simpler, is less demanding, requires no sacrifice. There is no controversy. Not to mention there is less chance of getting hurt.
But, it's the opposite of God.
Not to mention, it's boring.
Not satisfying what-so-ever.
I've been on the wishy washy cycle with this false humility thing for several years now. I move forward. It says "What?! No way, Hosea." It whispers in my ear "Now, don't go too far. You don't want to bring attention to yourself." I slow down. I take a break.
Then, I remember who I am.
I take a few more steps. It says "What??! No way, Hosea." You get the picture.
But everytime, I take a bigger step. And everytime, this bugger is easier to snatch. As my spirit grows bigger, he can't compete.
And you know how my spirit gets bigger...and stronger?
As my faith becomes effective, by my knowledge of the good gifts given to me for Christ's sake.
And that's all I have to say about that. (credit Forrest)
(corresponding song: Smile by Uncle Kracker)
Excellent post, sister. I just listened to Mark Driscoll's message on the parable of the Wedding Feast...I got me rocked due to the problem of pride, which is often what i'm accused of when tempted into false humility!
ReplyDeleteSomething I wrote down the other day while contemplating/praying about competition: I was sitting in a room full of very talented men - very gifted. And began to realize how awesome each one of us was. And began to be a little jealous. Shutting down all the lying crap, I wrote in my notes:
"God has enough destinies for all of us. There's no reason for me to think about this next person."
OK, the rest of this comment just turned into a blogpost. http://www.davidchapdelaine.com