Faith ReMix.

My friend asked me to write a blog on fear to follow up after my thoughts on shame.  Well, I decided to do something even better than write about fear. I decided to write about faith.

Yes, faith. It's such a controversial topic really. Faith? Controversial? Yes. The definition of faith has definitely warred in my soul. Hasn't it warred in yours?

I think for many of us, fear and faith have been the exact same thing. We have "faith", but it's fear based--it's performance based.  It's the kind of "faith" a lot of us have been taught...unfortunately.  It's the kind that strikes up a little kick in the tush that says "If you want to see God come through the way you hope, you better do enough, pray enough, fast enough, obey enough, please God enough...enough...enough...enough." It causes us to push and grunt and strain and "contend" for something He's-already-done.

Ohhhhh boy.

You mean conjuring up faith isn't really faith at all?

Nope.

It's fear.

I tell you this because boy oh boy have I had it backwards a time or two (or twenty).  And boy oh boy am I watching a lot of people ask for a hernia.  Who voluntarily asks for a hernia? Nobody.

Nobody in her right mind anyway.

So, that's why I started thinking differently. I was tired. Exhausted. Desperate. Didn't even have the least bit of energy to conjur up anything (except a bad attitude--because all that contending made me irritated).  Not to mention, it was getting me nowhere. Except for running around in circles. It definitely got me there.

And so...it was at the point of my desperation where God gently said "Hey Sarah--whatcha doing?"

(When God asks you a question like this, you can be pretty sure that He already knows the answer. It's kind of like: "Adam? Where are you? Hiding in the Garden because you're naked?")

It wasn't until I heard Him ask me this question that I realized how crazy I was.  Albert Einstein said that the definition of Insanity is "doing the same thing over and over again but expecting different results." Guilty as charged.

So then He said, "Ok. Good. Now that we've got that squared away, how's about we move forward?"

"Yes, please."

And that's when it all changed.

He started pulling me out of this activity and that activity.  He started giving me some space to be alone with all my idiosyncracies and weaknesses and seemingly shortcomings. He asked me to start getting comfortable with my creativity so I could productively release all those excess emotions. And then, when I wasn't distracted by this person asking me to do this and that person asking me to do that and myself asking myself to do x and y and z-----I started to hear His voice.  And you know what He said?


"I love you just the way you are. And you know what? You're so awesome."

Enter Faith from Stage Left.

There's something about when the God of the Universe says "I see you" that is overwhelmingly accepting and believable. No need to conjur up anything.  At this point, it's a miracle if you can still stand up.

And then you know what?

Everything else shifts.


Mountains move. Hearts get healed. Disease disappears. Love Reigns.


And from that moment on, you don't even remember what you were praying for or trying to conjur up in the moment.  You're too busy being overflowed with ecstacy. And joy.

And you're looking for the next person to unleash it on.

"Who wants some of this? I'm giving out free stuff!"

And person after person starts knocking on your door. This is favor.  This is God.

This is the Kingdom He's always talking about.  Upside down.  He comes to the brokenhearted and the crippled first. Those who are desperate.  Hungry for love.

The Mary Magdalene's. The prostitutes and tax collectors.

He's not interested in performing for Pharisees. He likes hanging out with the ones who know they ain't got it all together. In fact, they have nothing together. That's why they need a God.

That's why they need a cross--because no one can fulfill the 10 Commandments on her own.  We might as well let Jesus do it--and then just receive what He's done.  It will make obeying them a lot easier--because we won't even be thinking twice about it.  We'll be too caught up in the joy of His eyes.


Drunk on Love.

There's a reason His first miracle was turning water into wine.  Because Jesus, contrary to public belief, knows a good party.  He's all about weddings.  And celebration. He's all about Covenant.


(He doesn't do prenuptial agreements--because He's not thinking about divorcing anyone.)


He's busy getting ready to see His bride.  That's what the Bible says.  And I believe it. Because I've been looking into those Eyes. Those piercing eyes.  They are just as desperate for me to understand as I have been desperate to know.  It's all been on purpose.

To get me here. Faith.

Faith erases fear. Eradicates fear. Fear isn't even worth talking about.....

because He's got other plans.

Good ones. Plans of peace and not of evil, plans to prosper me and to give me a future and a hope. (Jer. 29:11)

Heaven on Earth. Heaven in the Now.

Happy Father's Day, Abba. Today, we celebrate You. You're the best Dad I know.