Sabbath.

I used to like to answer emails, clean the house, organize things, take Ella for trips to "far-away" lands (the park), and eat my lunch--at lunch time.  In other words, I liked to be what I believed was "productive".  I was livin' life...I could get a lot done in a short period of time.

And then...something happened.

Someone happened.

Sometwo happened.

And life changed a little bit.  I was still getting things done. I mean, I created a human being with my body.  That is definitely productive.  And yet, the quantity and quality of that productivity changed.

About a month before Lucy was born, I deliberately took a month to "rest". We had a pretty busy period of time during most of her pregnancy. So, April was all about soaking up the quiet. Napping. Relaxing. Spending quality time with Ella as an only child.

I kept hearing one of my favorite Mike Bickle quotes over and over during this time.  "Lovers will always outwork workers." I love that quote.

I used to love being involved in everything. Earlier in life, I was 99% extrovert. I was also what you could call over-extended.  Oh, and codependent.

But something in my brain switched when we moved to a gulf view of Alabama's coast about five years ago.

It's what I like to call "The Slow Down".

It turned two 99% extroverts (my hubby and I) into two 99% introverts for about four years.  And, you know, I've come to a whole new appreciation for my introvert side because of that.  I would now say the scales are much more balanced. We're more like 50/50...but that down time, that introvert time, it just has to be.

I have to take time to pull the sheets up and nourish my soul with the stillness of nothing.  With the Sabbath resonating in my spirit.

Having another baby helps with this.  It reminds me of how quote "productivity" can shield us from refreshment.  And from life.

My pastor once gave a sermon about the presence of God.  He said that having a new baby is the closest example he could think of that described the importance of stewarding God's presence.  When a new baby arrives, everything is about that baby.  If the baby cries, you comfort it. If the baby is hungry, you feed it.  If the baby needs a diaper change, you change it.  There is nothing more important that what that baby needs. You don't sleep unless the baby sleeps, and you don't do anything unless the baby is taken care of.

And that's exactly what this feels like. Stewarding the presence of God.

The Slow Down.

Productivity takes on a whole new meaning.

My husband came home from work the other day and sweetly said: "Hi Honey--How was your day?"  I replied: "Ummmmmm, I wiped about twenty butts. How was yours?" Now previous to this day, I would not have thought that changing that many diapers in a day was considered "productive".  At first, in fact, I may or may not have thought "What just happened to my life?"

But as the days go by, and I realize how much anxiety-induced productivity my life once included, I think to myself "Wow. Wiping twenty butts isn't so bad."

I'm learning a whole new rhythm.

The Slow Down.

It's actually quite nice.  It automatically axes the activity that I may or may not have needed to do before.  When I only have three hours of my day to do something for myself, I'm much more picky in choosing something that will actually be beneficial to me and to my family.

And sometimes that is doing nothing.

And in the nothing, something is birthed.  Sometimes I often wonder if God is just waiting for us to stop.  You know, like when you're trying to dress a toddler? If he or she would just sit still for a little while, it'd only take a few seconds to get dressed.  To be ready.  For whatever the day might hold.

For whatever a Life may hold.

It's really a lifestyle choice.  And one I've absolutely fallen in love with.....

When I award myself the time to be a Lover, I am way more "productive" than when I thought I should be a worker.

It's a beautifully freeing way to live...

Happy Sabbath.....