Dreams.

I've been thinking a lot about dreams lately.  Go figure. I am a dreamer. A sillyheart. I love to think about HOW BIG something could be, how possible God can make the seemingly impossible.  It's just how I am programmed.  Classic visionary.

But you know us visionaries, sometimes we have trouble getting started, implementing, and following-through.  (This is where I suggest marrying an implementer and administrative genius.  I did, and he kindly gives me nudges when I need it. Thank God!)

You can say that I have been born with a perpetual generational defect called procrastination.  Most often, I think it comes from a fear based place.  You know, I dream big and put my "faith" out there, and then when it's time to take a step, it just might take me awhile.

"Peter, it is I...step out onto water."

"Are you a ghost? I don't know if I.....Um, I think I've gotta go to the bathroom first."

Oh, Peter. You of little faith.  You must be the brother of Sarah.

But really, ever notice that the reason Peter fell was not necessarily because he took his eyes off of Jesus but possibly because he didn't believe in himself the way that Jesus believed in him?

I have heard the argument that Jesus doesn't believe in us; it's all about Him.  Though there may be some sort of a small streak of wisdom in that, I think it's really easy to make it "so about Him" that we lose who He made us to be in the process.  Ever notice that when you're constantly obsessed with repairing yourself and working on your humility because you want do something for Him, that you are actually just working out of a religious spirit?  He doesn't want people to do things for Him, He wants us to do things with Him. I've been subtly releasing my white-knuckle grip to allow Him some space to love me out of that mentality for, um, awhile now.

Anyway, back to that dreaming.  I have to say I like it.  I've come into this season where I'm learning what it means to step out onto that water.

One step at a time.

And finally, all those dreams and prayers, are starting to hatch....like a bunch of eggs in a chicken basket.  And each one requires only a little effort on my part.  Usually just the exchange of proscrastination for faith.  I just say no to the one and hello to the other, like a gift that is just plopped into my lap.  And I've noticed, that as each little egg hatches, I have a physical manifestation of the peace that was already mine to lay hold of...that really I had just been procrastinating to receive. I just had to simply let go...of the procrastination, of the excuses, of the fear.  And I had to give voice to the hope, and faith, and love that was ready to be birthed.

I have this amazing Mama friend named Christine.  And you know what she said? She said that if we don't release the intercession that we're holding, it becomes toxic in our bodies.

Our own procrastination kills us. (emphasis mine)

In a world where ugliness often abounds, the earth (and our bodies) are just waiting for that hope to be released.  It's healing....in a sick world.

So, when you think of a great idea, and you want to implement it but get caught up in that..."I don't know if I could do that", just change your mind, and let it out...receiving Hope, not only for yourself, but also for whoever might stumble upon your idea fulfilled.

It's just taking that step.

...and then watching His face shine as you walk out on the water.